My Worth: A Reflective Journal
By Mona Wazi Ullah
This assessment was and is very close to my heart, it was for my Visual Culture class where the task was to show our individual visual culture through 10 pages of the book which can be a traditional journal or can be pop up box.
The requirements of the assignment were mandatory 10 pages and a cover that is connected to the pages. I was nervous about this assignment and wasn’t confident that I can pull this project off and portray all the emotion I had which made this my favourite piece of work. The experience was quite overwhelming at a point, but I made it at the end. It taught to stop doubting myself and enjoy life a little bit more because things do work out. There is a lot of things that can be improved particularly working on a specific topic instead of jumping from on topic to another. Also, there are few mistakes if you see the book in person the glue isn’t sticking the paper properly. I would love to work on those things in future.
Growing up in brown culture, I often would ask myself “am I worth it?”. The question always stuck to me no matter phase of life I was in. I always thought I needed someone to tell me that it was me who had the answer to it. So, I wish I could go back in time and tell my little self “you’re worth it”.
First and foremost, the front cover represents me as a small, naive girl asking the world if I am worth it. at the end of this journal on the back cover I have realized that, yes, I had to tell her she is worth it and has made it this far. The inspiration of it was taken from the best-selling novel “The Fault In Our Stars”. In this journal, I showcase my journey of going through the things I faced in different stages in life and how it shaped me into who I am today. It may be minor situations for some people, but only people who went through this rollercoaster of emotions would understand how it really impacts a person.
The pages Inside the journal represents how hard it is for the society to accept me the way I am. My culture finds it hard to accept my gender as I am a girl, since they prefer having sons over daughters for as long as I can remember. Also, my skin tone wasn’t accepted by my own people. They made me feel insecure and ugly in my own body just because I’m “darker” than everybody else. This journal also represents how people behave towards another person just because they are overweight, or because they are not able to speak properly. I have also shared a part of my life where an accident involving parts of my leg being burned has changed my perspective and mentality of many things in life. I also tried to convey the stereotypical mentality of people thinking how girls always like the color “PINK”. It was a back-and-forth process of thinking to add about the recurring harassment and abuse a girl goes through in life.
And lastly, I tried my best to show how parents’ pressures can force a person like me to almost give up on my own dreams and not owning to the kind of people I belong to. These things have made me question my self-worth for as long as I’ve lived. I have learnt the hard way that I don’t need anyone’s acceptance or approval, rather my own acceptance towards myself is more important.
About Mona Wazi Ullah
I am currently enrolled in first semester of Art and Design Fundamentals in Centennial College. I have been a science student all my life, my passion was art from childhood, and I want to make it my profession and this my first step to peruse my dreams. Not sure where I will be going after this program ends yet. But in future I sometimes picture myself to be an Art director.